


There are claw marks on the table

by TheMostCrimsonOfCalicos



Series: A kitty cats crouch and a kitty cats pounce [1]
Category: Undertale
Genre: Cat Puns, Gen, Skeletons, cat food
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-05
Updated: 2016-12-05
Packaged: 2018-08-31 22:10:25
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,189
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8595757
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheMostCrimsonOfCalicos/pseuds/TheMostCrimsonOfCalicos
Summary: When you're given a cat and you realise that you love it.
Or
Cat puns, a cat runs, and Papyrus is not having fun.





	

**Author's Note:**

> Oh look, I am capable of writing cute things. (At least I hope it's cute). Gotta write something potentially traumatizing later, to even this out.

Sans' head lay on his arms on the dining room table, eyelights scanning over the newest addition to the Skeleton household.

The addition in question gazed back at him as well, their own green eyes glittering with something seemingly akin to mischief.

Sans sighed through his teeth.

Papyrus had apparently heard that animals were great for helping out people who were sad or depressed or whatever. He'd insisted on getting Sans a cat, stating that maybe an animal companion would help him stop mopping around all the time. Sans hadn't really wanted a cat or a pet period, he didn't feel like he needed one, nor did he feel like he was the best candidate for pet ownership. However, there was no stopping Papyrus once he set his mind to something. So now he had a cat.

The cat was white with big orange spots all over them. Yes, them, because he honestly didn't really know how flesher beings checked for gender and he was not the most eager-est beaver on accounts of figuring out. So them the cat was until someone told him if they were a girl or a boy.

Really though, he wasn't sure what he was supposed to do with the cat. All they'd done so far was stare at him with their weird cat eyes and make odd noises.

It was probably a cat thing.

Maybe he could try talking to them?

Eh. It wasn't like he had anything to lose. Well, there was one thing. But he was pretty sure that cat's didn't understand the concept of 'dignity'.

Sans straightened up on his chair, making it lightly skirt against the floor, and causing his spine to pop.

The cat started, and looked to be about to run, before calming and settling back into their couched position.

Sans was surprised at the cat's fast reaction, and somewhat impressed. Papyrus had said to try and find things that he had in common with the cat. It seemed as if he had found one already. They were both quick. (Him only when he dodged or teleported, but, hey. He'd take it.) Sans chuckled, one of the cat's ears twitching as a result.

"you've got some fast reflexes, huh? not everyone has got those, y'know? guess what i'm try'na say is, you're a pretty cool cat."

The resulting silence would've had him embarrassed if not for the fact that his only audience was a cat. 

They didn't seem to really care for his puns though. Or about them. Or... really register them at all.

That was fine. That were a cat, so they'd get a pass for having no sense of humour. 

It sucked that they didn't get his jokes, but that didn't mean he couldn't test out his material on them.

Sans gave his head a small tilt before inquiring to the cat.

"what? didn't care for that one? well, that's fine. you probably just missed the pounce-line."

The cat just so happened to feel like getting up from their crouch and sitting.

Sans knew it was just a coincidence. Regardless, he decided to humour himself.

His grin broadened.

"oh, you liked that one, huh? if ya want, there's me-ore where that came from."

The cat yawned, and layed back down, this time spreading their furry body all over the table.

Sans found himself snickering.

"what a dirty move. make me all confident just to reveal how you really feel once i'm ready for more. you're not a cool cat, you're a cruel cat."

As Sans finished speaking, he gave the cat's ear a light flick. 'Cruel Cat' gave him a look, face upsidedown in their uncomfortable looking position. That was the look of a cat that had been personally offended.

Sans laughingly huffed, and softly booped their nose with a pointer finger.

"alright, alright. you're not a 'cruel cat'. you're still a 'cool cat'. geez, just met you like fifteen minutes ago and i already can't resist that face."

Sans placed a hand across the cat's head and gently scratched. The cat became a moter boat.

"hey, who gave you purr-mission to be so adorable?"

The cat moved their head with Sans' scratches and their purring intensified, tail swishing behind them.

"ye-ep. definitely cool. that's it, i'm calling you 'cool cat' until further notice."

Cool Cat gave no complants. The scratching of the cat continued in relative peace before there was a jiggling of keys and then the sound of the front door opening.

Cool Cat jumped, but was easily placated by their scratching.

Sans didn't turn to face the new arrival. It wasn't necessary. No one could mistake those loudly thumping footsteps.

Papyrus entered the kitchen, equipped with various bags, supposedly filled with cat things. In typical Papyrus fashion, he speaks very loudly.

"SANS! I AM BACK, AND I HAVE BROUGHT CAT THINGS!"

Cool Cat runs and burrows beneath the couch. 

Sans would've been a little upset at the cat's insensitivity, but, honestly? He'd probably spooked this cat a bunch throughout the day. And. Cats, so he'd heard, had sensitive ears. Papyrus was very loud. It was an unfortunate set up.

The cat items are placed on the floor, minus the bag of cat food, which is placed on the table.

Papyrus crossed his arms and looked at Sans. 

"WHAT DID YOU SAY TO THEM?"

Sans placed his head in his hands and grins largely at his brother.

"i dunno what you mean, bro. they were  _feline_ just fine a moment ago."

Papyrus narrows his sockets.

"THAT WAS A STRETCH AND YOU KNOW IT."

Sans kept grinning.

"huh, really? sorry bro, but that just doesn't sound  _claws_ ible."

Papyrus looked like his was on the verge of exploding. And then reforming. Just to explode again.

And then reforming a last time, but only to implode, ending the viscous cycle.

Before this could happen, however, he took a deep breath, and the quiet in the room lasted for about six whole seconds. Then, admirably calm, he spoke:

"SANS, MY DAY HAD BEEN GOING FANTASTICALLY, AND THEN YOU COME AND TAINT IT WITH CAT PUNS. DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW YOU'RE MAKING ME FEEL RIGHT MEOW?"

A beat passes.

Papyrus is frozen, absolutely stricken.

Sans is laughing wheezily into a hand.

Cool Cat has eaten a hole through the bag of cat food that was purchased, and is leisurely munching.

Papyrus picks up the cat from the table and places them on Sans' head.

"SANS, I'M DISOWNING YOU."

Papyrus turned his gaze on Cool Cat.

"CAT, TAKE CARE OF YOUR OWNER, HE'S BEEN DISOWNED."

Papyrus grabbes his keys and leaves through the doorway.

Cool Cat slids down with a squeak into Sans lap.

Sans looks down at his cat.

"huh. guess i really got under his skin."

The cat stares.

Then a call came from the living room.

"I'M GOING TO COOK DINNER WHEN I GET BACK! REMEMBER TO FEED THE CAT, BUT DO NOT THINK YOU ARE FORGIVEN JUST YET!"

There was the sound of a door closing.

"or not."

Cool Cat places a paw on Sans' sternum. They meow.

"that's what he said."

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> The cats' name is Cool Cat, or CC, until further notice. (Cool Cat does have an actual name and gender, if anyone was wondering.)  
> 


End file.
